AlltheJokes.com
The best humor! Marriage jokes and funny stories.

The groom, upon his engagement, went to his father and said, "I've
found a woman just like mother!" His father replied, "So what do
you want from me, sympathy?"

The wedding was over, and the reception was in full swing. Dave an usher, was having a great time with other members of the wedding party. His wife, Betty was not.
"Don't be to mad at Dave," a friend told her. "He did a terrific job. I'd be glad to have him usher at my wedding."
"Yeah," Betty replied, "I wish he had been an usher at mine."

Wife, opening mail, to spouse: "The bank says that this is our last notice. Isn't it wonderful that they're not going to bother us anymore?'

"The thrill is gone from my marriage," Brian told his best friend Mike.
"Why not add some intrigue to your life, and have an affair?" his friend suggested.

"But what if my wife finds out?"

"Heck, we are almost on the begining of the 21st centrury, Brian. Go ahead and tell her about it!"

So Brian went home and said, "Dear, I think an affair will bring us closer together."

"Forget it," said his wife. "I've tried that many times - it never worked."

A woman decided to have her portrait painted. She told the artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond necklace, emerald bracelets and a ruby pendant."
"But you are not wearing any of those things."
"I know," she said. "It's in case I should die before my husband. I'm sure he will remarry right away, and I want his new wife to go nuts looking for the jewelry."