Marriage jokes

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I've never been much on fashion, but got quite a few compliments on a new sports jacket I wore to work one day. My
secretary asked me where I got it and I told her that it was a surprise from my wife. I went home early yesterday, and there it
was, on the back of a kitchen chair.

Rating: 3.6 |

A man comes home early from work and finds his wife and his best
friend in bed. The man throws up his hands in disbelief and says, "My
God Pete !!! I more-or-less 'have to', but YOU ???"

Rating: 4.6 |

A friend of mine told me he had signed up with one of these on-line
dating services. I asked him the other day if he had had any luck and
he said he'd quit -- seems they'd matched him up with his wife.

Rating: 3.8 |

My wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife
hired a private detective to follow her husband and see if he were in
fact "cheating" on her. I asked my wife if she would ever do that.

She said, "Well not so much to find out who the other woman was, but
to see if I could find out what she saw in ya."

Rating: 4.2 |

The newlyweds arrived at the front desk of the posh ocean-side resort in Hilton Head, South Carolina, looking all fresh, and eager to enjoy
their two week vacation/honeymoon.

The stunning blonde at the front desk smiled and said, "Well, hi
Jimmy, how ya been lover ? Long time no see."

A frosty silence prevailed until the couple reached their room. Once
inside, the piqued bride demanded: "And just who was THAT woman ?!?!?"

The groom wiped his brow and said, "Just relax honey. Please ! I'm
going to have enuff trouble explaining you to her."

Rating: 3.0 |

Next marriage jokes »

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