Marriage jokes

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Two men are having an awfully slow round of
golf because the two ladies in front of them
managed to get into every sand trap, lake, and
rough on the course, and they didn't bother to
wave the men on through, which is proper golf
etiquette.

After two hours of waiting and waiting, one man
said, "I think I'll walk up there and ask those
gals to let us play through." He walked out to
the fairway, got halfway to the ladies, stopped,
turned around and came back, explaining, "I can't
do it. One of those women is my wife and the other
is my mistress. Maybe you'd better go talk to them."

The second man walked toward the ladies, go halfway
there and, just as his partner had done, stopped,
turned around and walked back.

He smiled sheepishly and said, "Small World!"

Rating: 3.4 |

A man calls his family doctor:

man: Doctor, for the last week my wife has thought that she was a rabbit.

doctor: Ok, bring her in and I'll try to help.

man: Fine, but whatever you do, don't cure her.

Rating: 2.2 |

A man comes home and hears hard breathing female noises from
inside the aprtment, walks inside to find his wife on the floor
of the living room naked. Wife yells, "help, help, I am having
a heart attack", the husband runs in the other room to call the
doctor when one of his kids run up to him and says "daddy, daddy,
there is a naked man in the closet", husband opens the closet
door and sees his friend Bob. He yells at Bob, "Bob, god damn it,
my wife is having a heart attack and here you are trying to scare
the kids"!!!

Rating: 3.0 |

Playboy is coming out with a new magazine for men who are married.

Every month the centerfold is the exact same woman.

Rating: 3.2 |

After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just dreamed
that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day. What
do you think it means?"

"You'll know tonight." he said.

That evening, the man came home with a package and gave it to
his wife. Delighted, she opened it - to find a book entitled
"The meaning of dreams"

Rating: 3.0 |

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