Marriage jokes

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A few moments after the daughter announced her engagement, her Father
asked, "Does this fellow have any money ?"

The daughter shook her head sadly. "Oh Daddy ! You men are all alike."
sighing deeply, she replied, "That's exactly what he asked me about
you."

Rating: 3.0 |

A student engineer in the office got engaged some time ago. At her
wedding, I was reminding her of the first day she wore her ring. None
of the other women in the office even noticed.

Finally, in sheer and total exasperation, she said "Boy !!! It's so
warm in here today, I think I'll take off my ring."

Rating: 3.4 |

A lady with a large flowery hat was stopped at the church door by the
usher. "Are you a friend of the bride ?" he asked.

"Certainly not," she snapped, "I'm the groom's mother."

Rating: 2.8 |

I know a husband and wife who have separate bedrooms, drive different
cars, take separate vacations, work different shifts, have their own
computers, and even have their own ISPs, separate e-mail addresses and
Home Pages. They say they're doing everything they can to keep their
marriage together.

Rating: 2.8 |

There were three guys in a bar. Two are talking about the amount of control they have over their wives. The third remains silent. After a while, one of the first two turned to the third and sez "Well... What about you, what sort of control do you have over your wife ?" "Well, on our honeymoon, I made damn sure my wife came to me on her hands and knees." he bragged and took another sip of beer.

His friends were amazed ! "What happened then ?" they asked, almost in
unison.

"Well, then she said, 'Get the hell out from under that bed and fight like a man !' " he admitted.

Rating: 3.4 |

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